It’s smelling like rain right now.
New week starting in the morning.
Seems like a sign of something.
All the windows are up; the sirens are singing; and the dehumidifier is trying to keep the shine from my forehead (but it’s not working).
I slept like a pregnant woman all weekend. Full of dreams that will not make their way into the public sphere anytime/soon.
However, I’m afraid I produced nothing for the endeavor. Okay, I did mix a couple more hot soundtracks to my life: a full moon mix (Floetry’s “it’s Getting Late;” Isley Brothers’ “Voyage to Atlantis,” Jill Scott’s “Crown Royal,” Meshell Ndegeocello’s “Beautiful…” Yeah, you get it). Lawd-a-mercy!
And then I had to mix things up with some kinda old obscure-ish hip hop (before I got myself into trouble). So I was wopping and smurfing (remember those dances?) to: Tuff Crew’s “North Side” and UTFO’s “Fly Girl” and Jungle Brothers’ “Behind the Bush” and… I could go on but I’m telling on myself so I won’t.
So back to this rain thing.
I’ve been thinking about starting over. You know rain = cleansing/purging = new as in new flowers and stuff…
Because I’m teaching (you knew it was coming back to this) and my students need to know that they don’t have to be whatever they’re expected to be; whatever they were last week or last year. And I’m not really feeling like I’m getting that point across.
Maybe that’s because, like me and most of us, they were told that “there are no do-overs” in life.
I figure if you’re not constantly in a state of doing it over, then you probably aren’t doing it—you know, life, right.
This is why I don’t like the concept of goals. I mean, if we are all gunning to “make it,” what happens when we get to “it?” By the time fruit and vegetables get to “it,” they’re rotten. From a purely biological perspective, we are no different than them. Which means…
The concept of “making it” is a little backward. Essentially the quest for “it” forces you to be so focused that the real goal is like a dangling carrot that will never really be reached. Because it (the carrot aka your goal) is not a fixed destination—it’s moving with you. And on top of that, it’s moving from some arbitrary hand.
I don’t mean to be the party pooper here but when there are only 1 in 100 who “make it” in any given endeavor, it’s obvious that there’s something misguided about the concept. If success only happens “when preparation meets opportunity” what do you say to all the folks whose opportunities don’t come riding up in a shiny carriage carrying the other glass slipper?
What it really takes to “make it” is not hard work or talent. It takes defining “it” as something more than money and material; less fickle than power or respect. Good luck figuring out what that is; when I figure it out, I will let you know. In the meantime, I’m gonna keep making up new adventures disguised as looking. (And more soundtracks to go along with them).