A Poem (trying to find itself)

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 In Another Life

I might’ve been
a girl
who took evening swims in brown water
bathed in it in grey morning
decorated my eyes with coal
and never felt anything
you do to me
but instead I am a girl who dreams
too much
about other places and people
I could never be
who feels what you do to me
and what
no one else can
as they shuffle
careful not to cause stones
to pop and catch me
in the eye.
and I hear like there is blinding yellowing
and fire orange in the whine and wails
I am the girl who feels drums in my teeth and
they will not chatter as the pace quickens
I am the girl who eats rice
with my hands
because I cannot see
why I should n’t
who cannot talk because
my tongue is
somewhere that even ink
cannot map
on…